Focus on the Family




“A Word To The Wives” Colossians 3:18:

Wives, submit to your own husbands, as is fitting in the Lord.” Now that is a loaded statement – just 12 words.

There are three specific passages in the N.T. that addresses wives.

  1. 1)Ephesians 5:22-24: “Wives, submit to your own husbands, as to the Lord. 23For the husband is head of the wife, as also Christ is head of the church; and He is the Savior of the body. 24Therefore, just as the church is subject to Christ, so let the wives be to their own husbands in everything.”
  2. 2) 1 Peter 3:1-6: “Wives, likewise, be submissive to your own husbands, that even if some do not obey the word, they, without a word, may be won by the conduct of their wives, 2when they observe your chaste conduct accompanied by fear. The Biblical Descriptions of a Wife
    1. a.She is a helper suitable Genesis 2:18, 20: And the Lord God said, “It is not good that man should be alone; I will make him a helper comparable to him.”
    2. b.She is the crown of her husband Proverbs 12:4: “An excellent wife is the crown of her husband…”
    3. c.She is a good thing Proverbs 18:22: “ He who finds a wife finds a good thing,

And obtains favor from the Lord.”

  1. d.She is the husband’s companion Malachi 2:12: “Yet she is your companion And your wife by covenant.”

3. The Biblical Duties of a Wife

  1. a.She is to submit to her husband 1 Peter 3:5-6:For in this manner, in former times, the holy women who trusted in God also adorned themselves, being submissive to their own husbands, as Sarah obeyed Abraham, calling him lord,
  2. b.b. She is to respect her husband Ephesians 5:33: “Nevertheless let each one of you in particular so love his own wife as himself, and let the wife see that she respects her husband.”
  3. c.She is to love her husband Titus 2:4: “that they admonish the young women to love their husbands, ,
  4. d.She is to be pure Titus 2:5: “…to be discreet, chaste, , good,
  5. e.She is to love her children Titus 2:4: “…to love their children…”
  6. f.She is to be a homemaker Titus 2:5: “…homemaker…”

   “A WORD TO HUSBANDS Colossians 3:19”

Husbands, love your wives and do not be bitter toward them

A. The audience: “Husbands.” These men had heard along with the other saints at Colosse – all of the doctrinal truths in chapters 1, 2, 3:1-17…

Some general regulations concerning husbands:

  1. 1.The one flesh concept

Matthew 19:5-6: “and said, ‘For this reason a man shall leave his father and mother and be joined to his wife, and the two shall become one flesh’?

The until death commitment Romans 7:2: For the woman who has a husband is bound by the law to her husband as long as he lives. But if the husband dies, she is released from the law of her husband. The affection connection

1 Corinthians 7:1-5: “Now concerning the things of which you wrote to me: It is good for a man not to touch a woman. 2Nevertheless, because of sexual immorality, let each man have his own wife, and let each woman have her own husband “It is good for man not to touch a woman.” Say what! Paul, what are you talking about?

“This is a Jewish euphemism” for [the act of marriage Genesis 20:6; Ruth 2:9; Proverbs 6:29]. In other words, Paul is saying that it is good not to participate in the act of marriage, that is, to be single and celibate. It is not, however, the only good or even better than marriage (Genesis1:28; 2:18). Nevertheless, because of sexual immorality…,

                   Pay close attention to the phrase: sexual immorality

                   in 1 Corinthians 7:2. There is a great danger of sexual sin when single

                   (Matthew 19:12). Marriage is God’s only provision for physical

                    fulfillment in the act of marriage. Marriage should not

                   be reduced simply to that, however. Paul has a much higher view and

                   articulates it in Ephesians 5:22-23; Colossians 3:18

                   He is, here, stressing the issue of sexual sin for people who are single.

  1. 1)1 Corinthians 7:3 render … affection due. Married believers are not to sexually deprive their spouses. While celibacy is right for the single, it is wrong for the married. The practice of deprivation may have been most common when a believer had an unsaved spouse (for more on unsaved spouses, 7:10–17).

Notice that powerful term in 7:4 Authority.

By the marriage covenant, each partner is given the right over the spouse’s body for the satisfaction of the other. In verse 5 Paul lets the hammer down…

  1. 2)Notice the word deprive in verse 7:5. Literally “stop depriving each other!” This command may indicate that this kind of deprivation was going on among believers. The Admonition: “love your wives and do not be bitter toward them.”

That is a strong admonition. It is fleshed out in Ephesians 5:25–29. This is a call for the highest form of love which is rendered selflessly: it’s not philo, it’s not eros, but rather, agape! Note the three following passages:

  1. 1.Genesis 24:67:Then Isaac brought her into his mother Sarah’s tent; and he took Rebekah and she became his wife, and he loved her. So Isaac was comforted after his mother’s death.


  1. 2.Ephesians 5:22–28: Husbands, love your wives, just as Christ also loved the church and gave Himself for her, 26that He might sanctify and cleanse her with the washing of water by the word.
  2. 3. 1 Peter 3:7: Husbands, likewise, dwell with them with understanding, giving honor to the wife, as to the weaker vessel, and as being heirs together of the grace of life, that your prayers may not be hindered.


      Let’s examine this noun.

          The Right View of Children Is In Focus!

They are God’s gift Gen.33:5:

They are God’s heritage Psa.127:3-5: says this, “Behold children are a heritage from the Lord, The fruit of the womb is a reward.

Here in Psalm 127:3–5, we can easily see that the principle of God’s sovereignty applies to raising a family. In Psa. 127:1, 2 God’s sovereignty is seen in 3 realms: 1) building a house, 2) protecting a city, and 3) earning a living.  

                  In all 3 instances, the sovereign intention of God is far more crucial to the outcome than man’s efforts.

                  Otherwise, a man’s endeavor is in vain (Eccl. 1:2; 12:8).

                  Verse 3 speaks of heritage … reward. Children are a blessing from the Lord. There are overtones of God’s

                   promise to Abraham to make his offspring like the stars of heaven and dust of the earth (Gen. 15:5; 13:16).

                   Psa. 127:4, 5: As arrows are indispensable for a warrior to succeed in battle, so children are invaluable as defenders of

                   their father and mother in time of war or litigation. The more such defenders, the better.

They are a crown of old age Prov.17:6: Children’s children are the crown of old men, And the glory of children is their father.  In other words, Godly influence generates mutual love and respect in a family, which extends from generation to generation (Ps. 90 with Ex. 20:12). 

The Characteristics of Children must remain in focus

They tend to imitate their parents (1 Kings 15:11, 26: “Asa did what was right in the eyes of the Lord, as did his father David.” Notice the contrast: “Now Nadab the son of Jeroboam became king over Israel in the second year of Asa

king of Judah, and he reigned over Israel two years. 26And he did evil in the sight of the Lord, and walked in the way of his father, and in his sin by which he had made Israel sin.”

They tend to be diverse in nature Gen. 25:27: “So the boys grew. And Esau was a skillful hunter, a man of the field; but Jacob was a mild man, dwelling in tents. And Isaac loved Esau because he ate of his game, but Rebekah loved Jacob.”

They need a Saviour Psa.51:5: “Behold, I was brought forth in iniquity, And in sin my mother conceived me.” Psa.58:3 says, “They go astray as soon as they are born…” furthermore, “…all have sinned and fall short of the glory of


The Capacities of Children can never be overlooked...AMEN

They are ready to glorify God Matt.21:15-16: … when the chief priests and scribes saw the wonderful things that He did, and the children crying out in the temple and saying, “Hosanna to the Son of David!” they were indignant and said to Him, “Do You hear what these are saying?” And Jesus said to them, “Yes. Have you never read, ‘Out of the mouth of babes and nursing infants

You have perfected praise’?”

They can be led to Christ Matt.10:13-16: “Then they brought little children to Him, that He might touch them;

They can understand Scripture 2 Tim.3:15: Paul reminded Timothy,  “… from childhood you have known the Holy Scriptures, which are able to make you wise for salvation through faith which is in Christ Jesus.”



“Children, obey your parents in all things, in all things. Present active imperative, epakuo to listen to, to obey. Paul also said this in Eph. 6:1–3:   

Children, obey your parents in the Lord, for this is right. 2“Honor your father and mother,” which is the first commandment with promise: 3“that it may be well with you and you may live long on the earth.” The only limit on a child’s obedience is when parents demand something contrary to God’s Word. Follow this line of reasoning: obey … in the Lord. The child in the home is to be willingly under the authority of parents with obedient submission to them as the agents of the Lord placed over him, obeying parents as if obeying the Lord Himself. The reasoning here is simply that such is the way God has designed and required it (“right”). In Hos.14:9, the Prophet raises and answers two questions: “Who is wise? Let him understand these things. Who is prudent? Let him know them. For the ways of the Lord are right; The righteous walk in them, But transgressors stumble in them.” So in Eph. 6:2- 3 Paul added this strong command: “Honor your father and mother…” That’s a good word – honor, A close examination implies that Eph. 6:1 speaks of action, while this term (honor) speaks of attitude, as Paul deals with the motive behind the action. When God gave His law in the Ten Commandments, the first law governing human relationships was this one. Paul quotes come from:


 Ex. 20:12: “Honor your father and your mother, that your days may be long upon the land which the Lord your God is giving you.


 Deut. 5:16: “Honor your father and your mother, as the Lord your God has commanded you, that your days may be long, and that it may be well with you in the land which the Lord your God is giving you.” This is the 5th Commandment.  It is the only command of the 10 that relates to the family because that principle alone secures the family’s fulfillment. (See Ex. 21:15, 17; Lev. 20:9; Matt. 15:3–6). Proverbs affirms this principle (1:8; 3:1; 4:1–4; 7:1–3; 10:1; 17:21; 19:13, 26; 28:24).



“Children, obey your parents in all things, for this is well pleasing to the Lord.“…this is well pleasing to the Lord.” This application is about the pleasure of God! That is, to satisfy Him. Pleasure is applied to:

God’s Sovereignty Psa.115:3: “But our God is in heaven; He does whatever He pleases.”

God’s Election 1 Sam.12.22: “For the Lord will not forsake His people, for His great name’s sake, because it has pleased the Lord to make you His people.

God’s Creative acts 1 Cor.12:18:But now God has set the members, each one of them, in the body just as He pleased.”

God’s Purpose for Christ’s Headship of the Church Col.1:19:“…it pleased the Father that in Him all the fullness should dwell.”



God bless and keep you is my prayer. Continue to live CORAM DEO…